I felt so rejected now. Even more than I had last night - not early this morning, last night.
It was like Teddy was back to his old self. Like all he wanted was last night and now that it was over, I was just his left overs from some fancy restaraunt that taste like puke once you re-heat them.
"Ted." I said and waved him over to a rack of stuffed animals for babies. "So Lea is pregnant and I want to buy the baby a stuffed animal, which one should I buy?"
"Huh?" He asked and looked at me.
"Forget it." I decided on the lamb and took it to the cashier. It was more expensive than any other place, but one day the kid could look back and say "My Aunt got this for me in New York."
I rolled my eyes at the scene in front of me. Julie was all over him, and he just let her do it. He didn't even try to get away and come to me.
This was our last day here and I wanted it to be special, but nothing was special to me anymore. I couldn't have one thing I could call my own without someone having to come along and ruin it. I wanted so badly to throw a can of bright blue paint in her hair and clothes so that they would be permanently ruined.
But I would settle for a pigeon pooping on her head. Yes, that would make my day.
- - - - - - - - - -
I wanted to be alone. Jaimie was in the guest bedroom, Julie was in the bathroom, the kitchen was occupied by Teddy's Mom, and His Dad, siblings and him were all in the living room.
I pushed the door to his room open a little and sat down in front of the window, my knees up to my chest with my arms wrapped around them and my face looking up to the stars.
I couldn't tell what time it was when he actually came into the room, but I imagined it was quite a while after I had been there. He flipped on the light and my eyes hurt while they adjusted to the sudden change.
"Tay?"
I turned around and gave him a blank stare.
"Are you ok?"
I laughed crazily. "Am I ok? Am I ok? What do you think? I've been ignored the whole d**n day! I thought you would be paying more attention to me instead of letting the stupid bar very *friendly* person hang all over you like usual, but I guess I was wrong! I had sex with you and I thought that meant something.."
"I'm sorry..."
"That's not good enough." I told him. "It's just not. I can't believe I did that. I seriously thought you could be trusted, but seeing as how you like bimbos, I don't think you can. I'll be so happy when I get back to Tulsa. The highlight of my stay here was last night, ok? What more does it take? Tell me!" I yelled. "I've put myself out there for you! The whole time you were with Ashley, I wanted nothing more than for you to break up with her. And after, I wanted you to come over and talk to me like we used to. I'm in love with the most shallow, pig-headed guy on the face of the earth, and I thought that guy was Ty, but man, I was so wrong!" I started crying and he just stood there taking it. He didn't say anything; didn't move. I left the room and I looked back over my shoulder and he still hadn't moved.
- - - - - - - - - -
Jaimie had heard a lot of yelling from Teddy's end of the hallway and knew things weren't looking too good. She sat up in bed as Tayah walked into the room and plopped onto the bed, head first into the pillow.
- - - - - - - - - -
Teddy solemnly turned out the light before going to sit on his bed with his hair in his hands. He didn't get any sleep that night; he didn't even try. It was just too hard.
- - - - - - - - - -
Jaimie and I boarded the plane silently, except for saying goodbye to Ted's parents, who seemed very sad to see us go.
A little while later, we were mid-air, and free to move about the cabin. I grabbed my carry-on and began rummaging through it, looking for my iPod. I couldn't find it. I must've put it in my suitcase.
I sat back down beside Jaimie and fell asleep, only waking up to buckle myself up and to get off the plane.
- - - - - - - - - -
Tulsa was actually covered in snow. Not the grey, slushy snow that occured after tons of cars and people have travelled over it, but actual, white snow.
Lea and my parents greeted us and I put on this fake, annoying smile as we dropped Jaimie off at her house and then made our way back to our own.
"So how was your trip?" My Mom asked.
"Did you bring us anything?" Lea asked almost immediately and I rolled my eyes.
"I bought all of you t-shirts." I told her as I unzipped by bag and noticed my iPod sitting on top of everything. I stuck it in my hoodie and handed them their cheesy, but somewhat stylish 'I love NY' t-shirts.
My phone started ringing and I took it upstairs, along with my bags, to my room. I plopped down on my old bed and answered it.
"Hey, it's me," Jaimie said into the phone. "I think you should turn the TV to MTV."
"Why?" I asked curiously and laughed at her. It was really random of her, but I turned the TV on to see an old interview with Teddy. "Ughh."
"No keep watching. I remembered this the other day." She told me. "Keep watching.. it should be after this commercial."
The VJ smiled at the camera as the show came back. "Ok, so last question before we go. It's your typical popstar question that almost every interview has, but it's what I'm paid to do, so I'm sure every teenage girl in America and maybe even Japan wants to know whether or not Teddy Geiger has a girlfriend..."
Teddy smiled shyly. "I don't have a girlfriend actually, but uh.. I sort of have my sights set on someone I met in Wal-Mart, actually. She uh... saved me, in a way." He smiled.
"Well, there you have it, ladies," The guy said. "Teddy is somewhat single. I'm out!" The show cut to credits a I flipped off the TV.
"And the point of that was?" I asked. I had never seen the interview before.
"He was talking about you!" Jaimie said, matter-of-factly.
"Ok.."
"Seriously.. that interview was done a year ago." She said. "Two years ago. It's possible he still feels the same way."
"You know what?" I asked. "I don't think I care anymore."
"What?" She sounded shocked. "You wanted this more than anything."
"I know, but I feel rejected." I told her. "And now all I want is to sleep it off like a bad hangover."
"Ok. I'll see you in the morning when we leave for Cali again."
"K. Bye."
I hung up the phone and put the earpieces to my iPod in my ears as I noticed I had a new file added. I didn't know what it was, so I listened to it.
It was Teddy.
"I'll be your winter coat, buttoned and zipped straight to the throat, with the collar up so you don't catch a cold.."Hmm. Teddy singing The Postal Service. I didn't remember putting this on here, and I assumed Teddy had done it as a way of apologizing. Ironically enough, the next song was 'Come Winter' by Daphne Loves Derby.
"...And never look back 'cause you won't forget why you cried."What do you guys think?